Are you a Jackie or a Marilyn?

[originally posted at]

By Chelsea Kaplan

Are you a Jackie or a Marilyn?
Both Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis and Marilyn Monroe loved men — and men always loved them right back, too. In many ways, these women were polar opposites; but interestingly, they also possessed many similar qualities that helped earn them a goddess-like (and enviable) knack for making men fall head-over-heels in love with them, says Pamela Keogh, author of Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Timeless Lessons on Love, Power and Style. If you’re ready to channel your own inner Jackie or Marilyn, follow Keogh’s tips below to snag the man of your dreams.
What it means to be a “Jackie” or “Marilyn” type
In order to summon the man-attracting powers of America’s most iconic sex kitten and good-girl actress, it’s important to see beyond Marilyn’s iconic body-hugging dresses, platinum curls and diamonds, and Jackie’s ladylike pearls, tailored shift dresses and sleek brunette bob, says Keogh. While Jackie was well-coiffed and ladylike in appearance, when it came to beguiling men, her inner persona was her most attractive asset. “What you have to remember about Jackie is that at the end of the day, she was going to take care of herself… and those in her crew,” explains Keogh. “Behind her gossamer veil of femininity, when push came to shove, she was not going down.” One does not want to cross a “Jackie,” asserts Keogh. Throughout her life, the former First Lady based her interpersonal relationships on loyalty, and a woman who identifies as a “Jackie” always does this, too. Men who are looking for a partner with discretion, stability and loyalty will always gravitate towards a woman with a “Jackie” nature, much like John F. Kennedy and Aristotle Onassis did.

Marilyn, on the other hand, was more vulnerable. This made her a great actress onscreen, in the boardroom and in the bedroom, but she was also more affected by the rough-and-tumble nature of the real world, says Keogh. A “Marilyn” woman falls in love like a teenager would — instantly and wholeheartedly. But afterwards, she might get bored and lose interest just as quickly. Unlike a “Jackie,” the “Marilyn” type is capable of enduring the company of an old beau — even if it’s someone who may have betrayed her. “Having had her heart broken, she understands forgiveness and the vagaries of the human condition,” says Keogh. “However, with her emotional fragility, sometimes a ‘Marilyn’ gal gets overwhelmed by the harshness of the world and can’t get out of bed. Sometimes she drinks a little more than she should, and sometimes she cries. However, because of her open-hearted nature, the world — and, of course, men — love her immensely.
Choose your strategy based on the kind of partner you desire
If you’re looking to score a driven, successful guy, employing a “Jackie” attitude will serve you well. According to Keogh, from very early on, Jackie had a plan to ensure that whomever she married would become the President of the United States. Since a “Jackie” type is the ne plus ultra of women, an ambitious man could do no better than to have a “Jackie” at his side as he navigates the world — which is why wealthy, successful men often gravitate towards a loyal, classy “Jackie.”
If you’re looking for a rock-solid father figure who will always care for you and never leave your side, it’s time to summon your inner “Marilyn.” Someone dating a “Marilyn” has to be extremely secure and confident for two reasons: First, a “Marilyn” will generally require a lot of ego stroking due to her emotionally tender nature; and second, nearly every man in the entire world will go after her because she’s such a sexpot. Think of the most beautiful, yet emotionally complicated woman you could ever meet: Is it Angelina Jolie? Halle Berry, maybe? Now, multiply that by about a thousand. Having a “Marilyn” in your life is like dating one of these women… she’s got beauty, baggage and all, says Keogh. Interestingly, the type of man who falls for a “Marilyn” is usually happy to do so — much like Joe DiMaggio did for Marilyn Monroe.
Mimic each woman’s level of modesty in online communications
In spite of each woman’s inherent fabulousness and quiet self-confidence, Jackie and Marilyn were both quite modest, says Keogh: “They had great faith in what they could do, but they did not brag.” Keogh believes that if these female icons were living today, neither would participate in any form of social media (although Jackie likely would have others use Facebook and Twitter accounts to promote the work of the John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum on her behalf). “Marilyn would have about a dozen fan sites around the world showcasing her work, but she wouldn’t troll the Internet, as there is a good chance she might read something mean and get upset,” says Keogh. So, try to channel similar levels of restraint while you’re dating someone by letting your actions — not your electronic communication and social media platforms — do all the talking.
Become a power player and earn your own successes
Though both women habitually associated with wildly successful and well-accomplished men, Jackie and Marilyn also had noteworthy lives of their own and took their professional careers very seriously. “Although they may have given the impression to a friend or one of their suitors of having just sat around waiting for the phone to ring, don’t believe it for a second,” says Keogh. Both of these women knew how to make things happen for themselves, which undoubtedly seemed alluring to the men who loved them. When looking for your own Mr. Right, make sure you come to the table with a full package touting your own interests, future plans and success stories, just like Jackie and Marilyn did in their heyday.
Discover your own iconic style — and work it
Both Jackie and Marilyn will forever be remembered as individuals who blazed paths in the realms of style and substance that are still being emulated today. As a woman looking for love, Keogh suggests paying homage to either of these ladies by developing your own individual “brand” — one that will make you uniquely appealing to men. “Mix it up a little — read philosophy, get your heart broken, write a love letter,” she advises. “Don’t mimic what you see in the movies or on a reality show… or a celebutante with a squeaky voice, faux tan and stripper shoes. In real life, both Jackie and Marilyn were distinct individuals. Don’t follow — lead!”


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